When you think about pole dance, what comes to mind? If you’re like most people, you probably think “sexy,” “risqué,” or “stripper.” And it’s very (unfortunately) possible you might have heard these things with a negative connotation. These things could have even stopped you from taking your first pole class, worried about what others may say or think about you. You might have even felt that it’s inappropriate to be sexy in front of others. 

That’s not true. And I’m here to say it’s something that many pole dancers have struggled with, including me.

Our culture has made strides in accepting a woman’s sexuality, but there is still a lot of work to be done. We are taught to not act or look a certain way out of fear, that we will not be taken seriously. How many times have you heard “act like a lady?”

Our sexuality is a part of us and is a driving force of life. Why must we hide it? Through pole dance, we aim to bring that side of us out and embrace it.

I am drawn to the sexier side of pole dance but it was not always like that. I have to admit I tried to distance myself from the sexier dancing in the beginning of my pole dance journey.

I felt so uncomfortable; my whole life I was taught that being flirty or sexy was shameful.

Though, there was another side of me that admired seeing women embrace that part of themselves. I wanted to be effortlessly sexy like them. 

So, I practiced. And I tried different moves and styles. I danced to different types of music. All until I found what made my body move the way I wanted it to. The idea that I needed to push out of my head was the “prescribed” sexy. Not everyone feels sensuality in the same way and it can look forced if you try to imitate another.

If you have ever taken one of my classes, you have heard me say “feel the music.” The reason is that I want my students to let go of what they see others doing and do what comes to them.

If you want to do a hair flick or a hip roll, do it! It is YOUR dance.

When you feel comfortable in your dance, the world will melt away. There are no judgments from others and you may even inspire your fellow students.

It takes a lot of courage to step into a pole class and do the opposite of what society tells you to do. When you embrace your sexuality, a new power within you forms. It does not shy away from showing your sexuality and instead celebrates it with others who have found that power. Are you ready to find *your* power and *your* sexy? Let us help you.

Thanks for allowing me to share my story with you, Francesca